The Penguin MUST die

Hello. This is a blog apparently. I'm not sure what I'm really meant to do with it. Maybe I'll talk about the time that I killed (probably, an accident) a penguin when I was in South Georgia (the Island in the South Atlantic, not the American state. They don't have Penguins do they ? Maybe in a zoo. Which zoo ? Doesn't matter) , maybe not. I did explain this on Twitter and bored the crap out of my followers, so maybe its not a good idea. Although, I could do it as more of a story.........maybe later.

As you can see I'm a little bit random. I'm a bad speller and swear a little bit. No, alot. FUCK, see. That was a bit of a show off. Aaaaaanywho, back to the blog. You see, my life changed as a result of the penguin incident (it really didn't, I just need a little dramatic effect). Since then I think I've lived about a hundred lives. I was in the Navy (I'm not Gay or owt. Not that that matters. The Navy accepts gays. Not very tolerant of them though..bit of inside information for you there. But I personally am not gay. Though I once saw a weird film in Amsterdam). I've lived in Israel and worked on a Kibbutz. Lived in Germany, Berlin and worked in Burger King on the Kufurstedam (or however you spell it my German is shocking and culminates in the only main word I know being Funeral - Beerdigung - another story). Been to College as a mature student and passed everything. Got Married to someone I thought was waaaaaaay out of my league. Worked a load of Mcjobs including selling industrial units to the Birmingham underworld. Made some kids, 2 of them, fucking irritating, but your supposed to love them aren't you. I do really. Got my own business, manufacturing. Its fucking HARD work, harder than anything, but I do get to do some skivepoo tweets and not give a shit (pun intended). Then here I am now. All in the space of 18 years since the penguin incident.

So you see the Penguin MUST die, otherwise my life would never have happened and I wouldn't be here to type this. It formed part of one of my lives from what seems like a million years ago. It was 18 years. I know I just said. I like being over dramatic.

It's strange isn't it that once I maybe, probably, accidentally killed a penguin and now that incident is part of my life forever. And you're reading this. Probably in your pants ? Maybe fingering a goat ?